Walmart, golf, Route 275 on Wiser’s mind
A Weekly COLUMN By Chuck Wiser, I write the words to share what my eyes see and my heart feels
I have been seeing this ad for well over a year now and in multiple places, but normally online. Every time I notice it I think to myself…Self, why don’t they fix it?
One thought is that despite the high cost of having it produced in the first place, Walmart didn’t want to throw good money after bad. Second option would be that perhaps the ad is getting more viewing and comments due to the obvious error catching people’s interest. Only a few of us “Grammar Grapplers” would be bothered by it. If in fact it’s a “hairing” aid to help grow hair in your ears, then spelling it properly would still be to their advantage. Oddly, it wasn’t until just recently that I noticed that it was a Walmart ad.
Whilst awake but not yet out of bed this morning I was going through my head arranging the topics I intend to write about and when my conscious mind thought of the “friend” to discuss many new ones, my subconscious mind thought of that word as pronounced “fwiend” by the Elmer Fudd cartoon character in the Bugs Bunny cartoons. As I tend to do, upon beginning this writing I wanted to confirm that the credit for that fwiend word goes to the right character. So, off to “Google land” I went for my research.
As usual, I got more than I bargained for and came up with quite a description and collection of cartoon character phrases. There are far too many to make that my main topic, when it wasn’t even yet a topic when I put my list together in my head, but it will be in the near future.
Elmer Fudd (or actually his creator, is credited, as noted below…
“Be vewwy vewwy quiet; I’m hunting wabbits. HEHEHEHEHE!”
— Elmer Fudd, Looney Tunes, the Trope Namer
The condition where characters (especially the cute ones) talk with the L’s and R’s replaced with W’s in their words, along with the softening of hard suffixes such as “-er.” In Real Life, the condition of replacing R’s with W’s is called rhotacism, a term that must have been constructed specifically to make those who have the condition unable to say it without invoking it. Similarly, it’s more likely than not that a character with Elmuh Fudd Syndwome will have a name containing at least one “L” or “R”, making it impossible for them to say their own name properly.
Back to me…I couldn’t imagine that there was actually a name for that but I’m guessing my penchant for words such as Wrambling, Wrabbits, and Wroundabouts falls into the category of rhotacism, as noted above.I wonder if it then would be fair game to call that “wrhotacism”?
I was reminded of one topic I wished to discuss as I hear trafficker’s on their way to work, passing by the house. What is this with the recent (years’) acceptance of extremely loud mufflers or any other vehicle exhaust system now being acceptable? In my innocence of youth and wanting to have “cool” mufflers I recall getting ticketed for that. Mine were “cool,” but not overly loud.
My mufflers were many, many decibels quieter than those of a motorcycle or especially these days, with the popularity of diesel fueled trucks. Living at, or near and intersection of a couple of roads I am “blessed” with constant speed changes as cars stop and restart at an intersection or “roar” around the corner as they head past the storage units on County Rte. 31 headed toward Friendship.
This isn’t going to be the corniest thing I ever say, or even perhaps not even today, but Bob’s Market now has corn available. For a short spell they were sold out, but Bob wanted me to announce that “The Corn’s Back!” And, I have already gotten another dozen. I have previously written that Bob’s corn is the best that you will ever find anywhere. The quality is unparalled.
I once again participated in the Allegany County SPCA Scramble 4 Animals Golf Tournament in Memory of Robert Hutter. Not having my own team, the staff teamed me with others that were in the same situation. In a way that was good news/bad news as we ended up with 5 people on the team, All but one of us being senior citizens. That combination ended up slowing us down “playing speed” wise, and ultimately, we were chastised by Wellsville Country Club management and asked to step it up a little. This happened when we made our turn to finish our last 4 holes. BTW, when we finished there were still teams behind us that had not yet finished but who were not pushing us. Thanks again to my playing partners: Holgar Kurschner, Dave Shenk, Pete France and Fran McLaughlin.
In the world of coincidences, one such happened in the pairings of that tournament. As play continued (too slowly by some standards I guess) we had the opportunity to share tidbits of our experiences and in some cases our living addresses. When I mentioned having grown up in the hamlet of Nile, outside of Friendship, Dave Shenk advised that he lives on Howard Road in that hamlet/town. I was intimately knowledgeable about that road as my summers and winters as a youth involved that road. The Howard Road intersects with State Rte. 275 near the intersection of Times Square St. on the western side and eventually leads to a tie in with East Hill Road, which connects with Cty. Rte. 31 just west of the Friendship Rod and Gun Club.
Most of the vertical elevation of the hill that makes up that road starts just off Rte. 275 and goes fairly straight for a half mile of so. In the summer I earned my spending money by working in the farm fields during haying season. The Thomson Family (Daughter Janet was a great friend who used to take me for rides on her horse Dolly) lived South of Nile on Rte. 275 but farmed the land on Howard Road. Riding the top of the bale filled hay wagon could be perilous if you didn’t pay close attention. I couldn’t swear that I was or wasn’t brushed off the top a couple of times as sometimes I think yes and other times I think it’s my imaginative old time memory bank kicking in.
In the winter Mr. Thomson would put the “Cat Tracks” on his tractor and haul his “Fertilizer” wagon up the hill for spreading in his fields. That Cat track width was perfectly fitted for a sled track or toboggan width. We would make the trek up the hill that half mile or so, then enjoy the thrill of the ride down. Occasionally we wouldn’t/couldn’t stop when we reached Rte. 275 and would shoot across the main road. On one occasion my cousin (one of the Miles boys) was hit by a car but, bundled up as he was, he was just rolled off the sled.
I want to send a special “shout out” to two recent Wramblings Wreaders. Late last week I received an email message from Bill Doerler, a former Friendship resident who grew up on Pennsylvania Avenue, the connecting link between Friendship and Nile aka Rte. 275. Bill and I have already shared a ton of memories from the past Friendship/Nile eras, and areas.
Most recently, just the other day to be exact, I received an email from Charles Van Heck applauding and thanking not only me, but also The Wellsville Sun in general, as noted in the salutation opening of his follow up message. The “clip” from his first reply to my query of using his name and some content is as follows:
“Dear Mr. Wiser,
You may use whatever you may want of my short note to you. I’m honored that you would want to quote me. You may use my name. You and the others at the Wellsville Sun allow me to return “up-home,” as we called the area. I like the optimism and community orientation, “boosterism” that uplifts the spirits and area businesses.
I understood your wanna-be-writer comment. I got side-tracked into corporate, then academia. I wrote academic articles and poetry. Don’t be impressed. I suspect the only people who ever read my work were my wife and the editors, who probably needed to fill space. But, now “retired,” I write more often. For a period of years, I edited a journal, a blog, titled The Woodhull Arts Journal. Besides essays and stories, it included in-depth interviews with artists. I had plans to do pieces on the artists and craftsmen and women around Angelica but had to drop the project. This past February, I revived the journal. The subjects covered are, like your pieces, whatever is on my mind from agriculture, environment, law, politics. You may not agree with the political view; I am a moderate leaning to the right on some issues and slightly left on others. Bob Confer wrote a piece, “The Deadly Stress of Farming” that led me to research and write a piece titled “Discussing the Undiscussed.””
Back to me…The above was just a “capture sample” of a couple of messages. As I read his comments it sent chills through me as our backgrounds are similar and we are almost images, even if mirrorlike reversed on some things.
I look forward to continued discussions with both Misters Van Heck and Doerler. I’m sure I will be sharing more of their viewpoints in the future as they so closely resemble my own memories in one case and philosophies in the other.
If you are out cruising around and are somewhat familiar with the area, take a trip over to Nile and turn up Howard Road off Rte. 275 for a short tour. When the fall colors have arrived would be an even better time as you can soak in the brightness and splendor of the Fall foliage. As a youth, and even on the hay wagon, we only went to the top of the first hill, Now I occasionally treat myself to an excursion “off route” as I return from a shopping expedition to Olean.
I may have to come up with a Weekend Wrambling this week as I have many leftover topics and tidbits that I didn’t get to in this “self-imposed” length limitation for my Wramblings.
If you have any comments, questions or concerns please email me at IM.Wiserdad@gmail.com
